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Thursday, February 21, 2008 ;

♥Fish ma' studies.

Oh my gosh. Oh My Gosh. OH MY GOSH. KILL ME MAN! I so so so so so so so hate myself for this. I totally screwed up my papers. For not studying hard, for being so last minute, now I know one day is not enough to study for examinations. If only I started earlier. ARGHHHHH.

Monday: First paper was BTC, I studied for it during the weekend, which is two days. Ok lah, the paper was like easy to me. The only mistake was not reading the marks allocated to the question. The question put IDENTIFY, usually this means stating the factors or something right, so I just put the two things to the question. I like totally memorised the whole thing but I thought it was a two marks question, so I just left it as that. At the very last minute, I looked through all the questions, to see if I answered the questions correctly, WHAT THE HECK, that question was 10marks! Before I wanted to write something down, "Put your pens down". Freako. I'm bloody pissed with myself. Lost 8marks just like that. I aimed for a high A for that man.

Tuesday: Second paper was MES, supposed to be the easiest paper to me. BASKET. Last minute study. The three chapters I studied on Wednesday with Gifford, I forgot everything by the time I tried to study on the midnight before MES paper. THIS IS A WARNING! Never study without sleeping. You will seriously break down and cry. That was what happened to me. I met up with Jonathan at King Albert Macdonald's at 12am. Alfi and Jina came along. Wanted to study till the paper, because I had alot of things to cover. In the end I got stressed out, felt so sleepy, and whatever I tried to cram into my head, sunk into my stomach. I lost my appetite, and couldn't relax. Just kept reading and reading, but I forgot everything. I went for the paper, and Waliao, I felt like crying lah. I wanted to cry at that point of time man. All the questions so damn easy, but I couldn't answer them because I got mental breakdown. This time I really gave up. I gave the teacher crap answers. I left blanks. CAN YOU BELIEVE IT. I LEFT BLANKS IN MES PAPER. I can't myself. I left the room telling Mr Ho, "Mr Ho, you will be super disappointed in my paper." I so wanted to cry my soul out. But held it back. Must be strong. I still have another paper the next day.

Wednesday: The last paper was the POA. This one best. I went home the day before and just plonked on the bed, because I didn't get a wink which lead me to have a mental breakdown. I set an alarm at 10pm, and asked Weijie to be my human alarm too. In the end, he left me with 200 over missed calls I didn't even get up. I woke up only the next day. I still damn angry with myself lah. Yah, anyway, I have never never never touched POA for the whole of my life unless there were tests, then I'd study the day before or something. But for this is the examination, even better, I studied few hours before the paper. I forgot the format for partnership, how to do Provision and Adjustments, and have never seen or done financial ratio before. I started studying for it only when I met Jonathan at 9am at KAP Macdonald's again. Alfi and Sihua arrived a while later, then we ate until like 10am, and finally opened our books. Huiqi came at a later time. I don't know how I did it, but I took 3hours to do two questions. And this included asking Sihua and Huiqi questions. I took 5minutes to try and remember the terms and formulas for financial ratio, but obviously, I kept forgetting them. I went into the examination like that, and I wanted to cry again man. My Provision and Adjustments I didn't know what to put where, even when I had the format paper, for Provision and Adjustments I put the share of profits on the wrong side, and for financial ratio, I managed to put the correct ratio, but I did only one side of the ratio for one type of ratio, that means like 6marks gone, and 7marks gone because I wrote only 2 irrelevant sentences for the last question. Everyone came out talking about losing their full marks, I there sobbing about getting 50plus maybe. AHHH. I hate myself!

I think I will get a GPA of maybe 3. Damn sad lah, then no more top student and no more money. No more NTU or NUS.

I promise myself to study harder next semester! Study at least two days before! Ok ok, if that's too little, make it three days! Because I know making a promise to listen in class is as good as breaking it. Next semester aim for GPA 3.6!
I shouldn't keep thinking of the results, and enjoy my holidays first, but this will definitely take some time to stop brooding over it. Blogging about it has made me feel loads better.

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